and we start anew

I always look forward to a new year. It is sort of like a new day, only longer, a clean slate... a chance to reflect, grow, improve, ponder, clean. A time of hope for positive things to come in the year ahead. I always try to greet the new year as a time to get the house reorganized after Christmas.Before we can move forward though, it is only fitting we put 2009 to bed.
The twins turned 2, Katie 4, Adam 8......WOW! The only times in their lives they will be half each others age!!!! Cute, trivia :)
There have been sooo many changes this year. Some hoped for, some surprising, some sad, none can be taken back.There are a couple things I swore I would never do and did. A few I didn't do but wanted to.

Old friendships were rekindled. New friendships formed. Continuing friendships developed deeper.There was more than anyone's fair share of tears. There was also more love than I could have imagined or hoped for.The kids switched rooms, went on a lot of trips, had a couple medical visits and experienced their first car accident. They also participated in football and dance.There were trials, tribulations, questions. Even better, there were hugs, happiness, hope.This year brought a few less diapers and a lot more laundry!This year was also kind enough to bring smaller clothes, healthier eating, an addiction to running... as well as a continued love of dark chocolate and cooking and eating.
Mr. Producer visited new states and even better, new countries; while I got a tattoo and pierced my nose.The house enjoyed some much needed remodeling.We have had a couple additions to the family, 5 chickens, 1 bunny and 1 hamster. We have also had a couple losses, 2 chickens and 1 bunny :(Trips to the beach, disney, parks, church, family and friends house have brought memories and stories we will forever share and cherish.
Even with all the changes, there have been constants aplenty this year.
Our families support, encouragement, love. Our ability to laugh, work hard, embrace challenges and learn from them, and love.
We may not know what 2010 holds for us. We all have wishes, plans and goals. But there are no guarantees in life. We are all eager and ready for whatever the new year brings. The only thing we know for certain is that it will bring continued love, fun and chaos (and lots of wii playing)...... ENJOY!With love to family, friends and fans......may God bless you with the best year yet! And the urge to leave me more comments :)

Traditions

Growing up, I always wanted to be at the grown-up table, not because it seemed more fun, but because it seemed so mysterious...

While it may have seemed boring that they just sat around and talked, there was always something to wonder what they were talking about.

Constantly told to go play, I was always curious and convinced, there were great secrets being told. Conversations being discussed that were inappropriate for little ears.

Not once in my youth did I ponder that perhaps the conversations being discussed were work, finances, friends, free-time, or heaven forbid, the very kids being shooed away.

As I grew up to be a teen and young adult, I viewed these secret table or relaxing around the living room discussions as the most boring of times.

Today, as an adult, lucky enough to take part in these conversations, I can attest to the fact that they are in fact one of my favorite holiday traditions.

It seems that every year Mr. Producer and I add traditions to our Christmas season. Some are so sadly missed if the opportunity does not allow us to partake and others, well, quite honestly, they cause me stress, but they are part of our yearly traditions.

In no particular order, here are a list of our traditions.....

Helping out my church serve food and adopt a family less fortunate than out own.
Buying a new ornament for each member of the family to signify something that happened that year.
Walking around our city park and looking at Christmas lights.
Going out to dinner, fast food & totally unhealthy, before we embark on driving around and looking at christmas lights.
Opening a present on Christmas eve.
Going to Christmas eve service.
Buying each other our own personal wrapping paper.
Writing down goals for the next year, both individual and as a family.
Eating the same Christmas dinner cooked lovingly by my father in law.
Eating cinammon rolls for breakfast on Christmas morning.
Setting out cookies of course, and carrots for the reindeer.
Tracking Santa on Christmas eve.
Setting up the Nativity scene.
Discussing each ornament as we hang it on the tree.
Staying up too late Christmas Eve.
Napping Christmas day.
Losing or forgetting a present :)
Watching the kids Christmas play and going out to breakfast afterwards.
Having an extended family Christmas party.
Opening the advent calendar.
Cuddling next to the tree.
Drinking too much coffee.
And yes, sitting around the grown-up table, talking, laughing and being reminded of how blessed we really are with great friends, family, health and love on this fun, chaos of a journey, we call life.

So, whether you are a bah humbug or you thoroughly enjoy Christmas, you can't escape traditions, they are what makes your family unique!

Tell me what are some of yours?

MERRY CHRISTMAS........

forging ahead

Usually I write letters to you guys on your birthdays but somehow it seemed fitting to write a letter to you tonight.I put you guys to sleep in my room tonight so that your daddy could repaint your room and turn it into a princess haven. It was so bittersweet to cuddle with both of you together. Reminiscent of days gone bye. As you have gotten older the chance to snuggle with you both at the same time has turned into more of a battle than an enjoyment. Tonight however, you both seemed to sense that changes were coming. You argued not over who got to be closer to mommy but of wanting to be by each other.For 3.5 years (if you count since conception) you guys have slept together (at least in the same room) nightly (with the exception of about 10 NICU days). Even when you were struck with the stomach flu last year, you...me...daddy all slept together. Most things you guys have done together. You may have learned to walk or talk at different times, but you still did it together. You guys still wake up in the morning or from nap time and play together for a while before you join the rest of the family. You still ask for each other when you are not together.Tomorrow will be the move from the big kid room & babies room to the boys & girls rooms.You guys are ready to be with your same sex counterpart. Jason and your love of all things boy and Becca your desire to be just like your "best sister in the whole wide world, Katie".I hope you become closer to your siblings. Mostly Jason and Adam. Not that you aren't close, but your age spread has been more of a disadvantage to you two than the girls. Yet, I so hope and pray that you never lose the special bond you to have. The ability to communicate in half sentences and looks or mere grunts.
You guys are unique in your right as siblings. I envy you that. You complete each other in ways nobody else, even your spouses, ever will. I am glad that you are opposites, it makes you each so very unique. Yet, you are each others yin to yang and I hope you always will be.
So, while it will be bittersweet to separate you two tomorrow, it will also be cute to watch you guys forge new ways independent of each other. I do wonder if you will carve out alone time just for each other, if you will sneak into each others rooms or beds. For even now, sleeping in my bed, you are turned into, facing each other. We have always said that you guys let us into your world. May you hang on to that world in spite of not constantly being right next to each other. And may you always know and appreciate how lucky you are to have a twin.
I love you my big kids....my boy and girl...my twins...forever my babies....

ask and recieve

I wanted someone who would dance in the living room with me
*** I got someone who makes my coffee every morning ***

I wanted someone who would tell me I am beautiful
*** I got someone who allows me to stay home & raise our children ***

I wanted someone who made me feel like a princess
*** I got someone who doesn't complain when the house isn't clean ***

I wanted someone smooth, fun, exciting, intoxicating
*** I got someone honest, faithful, loving ***

I wanted someone to sit on the couch and snuggle with me all night long
*** I got someone who forces me to sit down at the end of a long day ***

I wanted someone daring, exotic, mysterious
*** I got someone who is laid back, goofy, unfailing ***

I wanted someone to "cuddle" with in the rain, under the stars
*** I got someone who will go to the store in the middle of the night in the rain ***

I wanted someone who would make me his world
*** I got someone who has given me the world x 4 ***

I asked for someone perfect
*** I got someone perfect for me ***

Remember the best things in life are not what you ask for, but what you are given.....

Happy 12 years Mr. Producer!

I LOVE YOU!

Katie's candy

Tonight Mr. Producer, amazing girl, little man and I went and volunteered with my church at a dinner and Christmas gift giving party for displaced families. This is one of the highlights of the Christmas season for me. Often, I am not ready to embrace Christmas, I simply go through the motions, before this blessed event occurs. Every year I leave humbled and thankful for the chance to be able to serve and love others. I am even more thankful that I get to pass this on to my children.

So, tonight, feeling all warm and fuzzy from hearts full of selflessness, we come home to open the advent calendar. With 4 kids, it is up to the discretion of the parent (usually based on their behavior that day) who gets to open the calendar and subsequently eat the chocolate candy inside. Tonight, Mr. Producer told all the kids that they got to pick who did this coveted job. Fully expecting Adam and Katie, with hearts full of love and God's grace to say "let so-and-so have it", I could only roll my eyes heavenward with a prayer and I say when they began to fight over it. Of course, doing anything Katie does, Becca immediately began to join in. When daddy asked Jason who should have it, he said.... Becca....

Can you guess who got the candy?

So, later when the tears (yes, tears over a piece of candy) died down and the older 2 were ready to talk, I used the candy as an opportunity to talk with the kids about being selfless, loving, and kind. We talked about the difference between being kind and being nice. We discussed listening to God instead of listening to satan. We discussed the reason we celebrate Christmas.

(which for the record goes a little something like this. The kids know that Jesus was born for us. They know he was born to save us. As for Christmas, we talk about what gifts we can give Jesus, our hearts, belief and love (katie also includes toys and chocolates, I'm pretty sure Jesus is a fan of chocolate :). Then we talk about how everyone gets presents on their birthday but that Jesus doesn't need presents, so he has santa bring presents (and chocolate if your katie) to all the good kids) theology lesson over

The children are intently listening. They are agreeing, nodding their heads when appropriate. They are answering my question, they are talking about God's love, they are saying how great it felt to give to others.

I wrap all this up with asking what they can do tomorrow to be able to open the calendar and eat the chocolate.... and with all the seriousness of a 4 year old, with all the love of the Lord inside her, Katie so earnestly responds........

Wait and do the calendar when all my brothers and sister are in bed.........


I love you Katie!