Monday, November 9, 2009

Ex's

We all have them. The degree to which they were a part of your life may vary, but even as early as second grade, there are boyfriends and girlfriends now...OH MY!!!!

What do you do when you run into...hear from an ex?

For some of us, an ex might be a time in our lives we would much rather forget exists. For others, an ex is now a reassurance that life is good. While for others, an ex just might happen to be a good friend.

I can honestly state that I am not currently friends with any of my ex's.
This was not a conscience decision. I have no problems with people, myself, or husband being friends with an ex. I guess I just figured out that I really didn't like them enough to want them in my life in any capacity!

With that being said however, I am grateful for all of my ex's, whatever their involvement in my life at the time. I am equally happy they are not in my life now. Although, I will admit to there being times I want to let them in briefly so they can see how far I have come. And, really, who wouldn't want to show off their family if it were as wonderful and cute as mine :)

A few months back, I had an ex, one I happened to be very involved with contact me through facebook. I debated on whether or not to respond. Our break-up was not exactly amicable and polite. But, 14 years have passed and really, I don't even remember what is was like to live with that man. Mr. Producer and I talked about it, briefly. Again, really, wouldn't I want this person to see how wonderful my life has turned out? Anyway, I opted to NOT respond to this person's email and 2 friend requests. Really, friends? Even on fb that is never going to happen...lol!

I chose not to respond, in spite of my immaturity to show off my kids, my life. I simply chose not to respond, because I didn't want any ensuing drama. I didn't want to give the impression that somehow maybe I still cared?! I didn't want to be involved in his life. PERIOD!

Thankfully, the anonimity of facebook allowed me to quietly hit reject friend request, delete email...end of story.

Last night, while out to dinner with Mr. Producer and friends, I saw another ex. While he saw me too, we did not speak. I can not saw whether we may have had I not been with other company, but I can say that out of respect for my husband, there really was no choice in not talking. I was and am okay with that. I could tell by looking at him how life has been treating him.

I wish no ill will on these men that use to be a part of my life. I would grieve if something happened to them. I have and will continue to pray that God grants them happiness and peace in life.

While seeing or hearing from them may have opened the floodgates of memories, both good and bad, it also reminded me that I am grateful for all the people that God brings into my life.

Some people look at past relationships as failed attempts to find happiness, I embrace these relationships as an opportunity to learn more about myself, life and love. The friend, wife, lover I am today has been shaped by the effects of these relationships on my life.

So, while I thank God daily for all the people in my life, both past and present, I thank Him even more for choosing the one that he did for me to wake up to each morning!

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